Boost your confidence!

How do you teach yourself to be more confident? Here’s Blalock’s advice:

1. Put your thoughts in their place.

The average human has 65,000 thoughts every day, Blalock says, and 85 to 90 percent of them are negative–things to worry about or fear. “They’re warnings to yourself,” Blalock says, and left over from our cave-dwelling past. It makes sense–if we stick our hand in a flame our brain wants to make sure we don’t ever do that again. But this survival mechanism works against us because it causes us to focus on fears rather than hopes or dreams.

The point is to be aware that your brain works this way, and keep that negativity in proportion. “What you have to realize is your thoughts are just thoughts,” Blalock says. They don’t necessarily represent objective reality.

2. Begin at the end.

“There are so many people that I’ve asked, ‘What do you want to do? What do you want to be?’ and they would say, ‘I don’t know,'” Blalock says. “Knowing what you want is the key. Everything else you do should be leading you where you want to go.”

3. Start with gratitude.

Begin the day by thinking about some of the things you have to be grateful for, Blalock advises. “Most of the 7 billion people in the world won’t have the opportunities you do,” she says. “If you start out with that perspective, you’ll be in the right frame of mind for the rest of the day.”

4. Take a daily step outside your comfort zone.

There’s a funny thing about comfort zones. If we step outside them on a regular basis, they expand. If we stay within them, they shrink. Avoid getting trapped inside a shrinking comfort zone by pushing yourself to do things that are outside it.

We’ve all had experiences where we’ve done something that terrified us, and then discovered it wasn’t so bad. In Blalock’s case, she was visiting a military base and had gotten to the top of the parachute-training tower for a practice jump. “They had me all hooked up, and I said, ‘I’m sorry, I can’t do this, I have a small child at home,'” she recalls. “The guy took his foot and pushed me off the tower. When I got out there I realized it wasn’t that bad.”

We won’t always have someone standing by to kick us out of our comfort zones, so we have to do it for ourselves. “Just act!” Blalock says.

5. Remember: Dogs don’t chase parked cars.

If you’re running into opposition, questions, and doubts, there’s probably a good reason–you’re going somewhere. That doesn’t mean you should ignore warning signs, but it does mean you should put those negatives in perspective. If you don’t make changes, and challenge the status quo, no one will ever object to anything you do.

6. Get ready to bounce back.

“It’s not failure that destroys our confidence, it’s not getting back up,” Blalock says. “Once we get back up, we’ve learned what doesn’t work and we can give it another try.” Blalock points out that the baseball players with the biggest home run records also have the biggest strikeout records. Taking more swings gets you where you want to go.

7. Find a mentor.

Whatever you’ve set out to do, there are likely others who’ve done it first and can offer you useful advice or at least serve as role models. Find those people and learn as much from them as you can.

8. Choose your companions wisely.

“Your outlook–negative or positive–will be the average of the five people you spend the most time with,” Blalock says. “So be careful who you hang out with. Make sure you’re hanging out with people who encourage you and lift you up.”

When she quit her C-suite job to write books, she adds, some people were aghast and predicted that no one would read them while others were quite encouraging. It didn’t take her long to figure out that the encouraging friends were the ones she should gravitate toward.

9. Do your homework.

In almost any situation, preparation can help boost your confidence. Have to give a speech? Practice it several times, record yourself, and listen. Meeting people for the first time? Check them and their organizations out on the Web, and check their social media profiles as well. “If you’re prepared you will be more confident,” Blalock says. “The Internet makes it so easy.”

10. Get plenty of rest and exercise.

There’s ample evidence by now that getting enough sleep, exercise, and good nutrition profoundly affects both your mood and your effectiveness. “Just moderate exercise three times a week for 20 minutes does so much for the hippocampus and is more effective than anything else for warding off Alzheimer’s and depression,” Blalock says. “Yet it always falls of the list when we’re prioritizing. While there are many things we can delegate, exercise isn’t one of them. If there were a way to do that, I would have figured it out by now.”

11. Breathe!

“This one is so simple,” Blalock says. “If you breathe heavily, it saturates your brain with oxygen and makes you more awake and aware. It’s very important in a tense situation because it will make you realize that you control your body, and not your unconscious mind. If you’re not practicing breathing, you should be.”

12. Be willing to fake it.

No, you shouldn’t pretend to have qualifications or experience that you don’t. But if you have most of the skills you need and can likely figure out the rest, don’t hang back. One company did a study to discover why fewer of its female employees were getting promotions than men. It turned out not to be so much a matter of bias as of confidence: If a man had about half the qualifications for a posted job he’d be likely to apply for it, while a woman would be likelier to wait till she had most or all of them. Don’t hold yourself back by assuming you need to have vast experience for a job or a piece of business before you go after it.

13. Don’t forget to ask for help.

“Don’t assume people know what you want,” Blalock says. “You have to figure out what that is, and then educate them.”

Once people know what you want, and that you want their help, you may be surprised at how forthcoming they are. “People are really flattered when you ask for advice and support,” she says. “If someone says no you can always ask someone else. But in my experience, they rarely say no.”

Source:http://www.inc.com/minda-zetlin/13-easy-ways-to-boost-your-confidence.html

Advertisements

How to have a happy & healthy mind

Did you know that you are heavily influenced by the people you surround yourself with on a regular basis? In fact, you pick up behaviors, mannerisms, opinions, beliefs and oodles of other information that your brain unconsciously absorbs, resulting in similar behaviors.
If you want to make a change, grow or break a habit or routine, look to your environment – the people around you, where you work, what you read and how you speak to yourself. All have significant influences on what you are internalizing, and have an impact on how you live your life. Here are five tips on keeping a healthy mind to help you on your way!

1. Meditation/Mindfulness

 

We read about the profound effects that meditation has on our mind, but how many of you actually do it on a daily basis? I used to be a complete fidget bum in my early 20s, and the thought of staying still for longer than a minute was catastrophic! It was certainly challenging, but I practiced and persevered and now find it pretty effortless if I give myself enough time to relax. I do have to make time every evening to relax and clear my mind before I can go to sleep, or else I won’t sleep well! Of course, first thing in the morning is also a great time to meditate. When you meditate, you are giving your mind time to clear, reformat itself for all the new information that is going to be taken in the following day, or day ahead.

 2. Media

 

As important as it is to be aware of what is going on in the world, the media is very centered on pain and negativity. This fuels pessimism, and ideally it’s best to avoid subjecting your mind to it regularly. There is no point in being stressed or worried about something you have limited control over; it’s a pointless waste of energy. Also, beware of brainwashing; all is not necessarily as it seems, and the media are great at exaggerating and bending the truth. If you want to make a difference to the world in some way, you could seek out some voluntary work or donate to a charity.

 

 3. Surround yourself with people who give you opportunities to grow.

 

 There is a metaphor which I love to use to describe letting go of old friends or relationships that are no longer useful to us. I like to call them “Old Potatoes.” If you can let go of some Old Potatoes, you can make way for New Potatoes. Friendships and relationships are based on love, and love is energy. When the frequencies change, you will find that particular friends and relationships may drop away, or you don’t feel you have anything in common with them any longer. If you continue to hold on to relationships which no longer serve you, they sap your energy resources or distract you from focussing your mind. Holding on to Old Potatoes blocks the doorway to gaining new ones. Don’t be afraid to let go if you feel the time is right; you will find that new opportunities will arise as a result. You never know who that next amazing person/teacher/friend/lover/mentor is going to be!

 

4.  Eat healthy

 

 Of course, eating healthy and staying hydrated are really important for brain function. I have spent many years discovering what my body likes and dislikes, and it’s taken me years to change habits and routines. But, I feel so much better for cutting down on wheat, dairy, caffeine and sugar. All of these things affect how I think and how my body feels. Of course, the experience is different for everyone, which is why only you know what your body needs and would benefit from eliminating. You can experiment by cutting out a certain food or drink for as short as a week if you suspect that your body is rejecting it. The turnaround time is normally five days to completely flush it out of your system.

 

5. Spend your time doing something you LOVE!

 

 The most important thing of all is to ensure you spend time doing a hobby or activity you love. When we participate in doing something we love, we radiate so many positive emotions, all magnetizing out into the universe to bring you back more joy and happiness. So many people get stuck in a rut and lose focus on what is important and brings them pleasure. Find something you love to do, and do it daily. Make time for it, and even better, make a career out of it! Life is supposed to be an enjoyable experience. Of course, you can learn through pain, but why learn through pain when you can learn and grow through pleasure?

Source: http://www.robinsharma.com/blog/09/become-the-most-productive-person-you-know/

Be more productive

Here are 21 tips to get you to your best productivity.

  1. Check email in the afternoon so you protect the peak energy hours of your mornings for your best work.
  2.  Stop waiting for perfect conditions to launch a great project. Immediate action fuels a positive feedback loop that drives even more action.
  3. Remember that big, brave goals release energy. So set them clearly and then revisit them every morning for 5 minutes.
  4. Mess creates stress (I learned this from tennis icon Andre Agassi who said he wouldn’t let anyone touch his tennis bag because if it got disorganized, he’d get distracted). So clean out the clutter in your office to get more done.
  5.  Sell your TV. You’re just watching other people get successful versus doing the things that will get you to your dreams.
  6.  Say goodbye to the energy vampires in your life (the negative souls who steal your enthusiasm).
  7.  Run routines. When I studied the creative lives of massively productive people like Stephen King, John Grisham and Thomas Edison, I discovered they follow strict daily routines. (i.e., when they would get up, when they would start work, when they would exercise and when they would relax). Peak productivity’s not about luck. It’s about devotion.
  8.  Get up at 5 am. Win the battle of the bed. Put mind over mattress. This habit alone will strengthen your willpower so it serves you more dutifully in the key areas of your life.
  9.  Don’t do so many meetings. (I’ve trained the employees of our FORTUNE 500 clients on exactly how to do this – including having the few meetings they now do standing up – and it’s created breakthrough results for them).
  10.  Don’t say yes to every request. Most of us have a deep need to be liked. That translates into us saying yes to everything – which is the end of your elite productivity.
  11.  Outsource everything you can’t be BIW (Best in the World) at. Focus only on activities within what I call “Your Picasso Zone”.
  12.  Stop multi-tasking. New research confirms that all the distractions invading our lives are rewiring the way our brains work (and drop our IQ by 5 points!). Be one of the rare-air few who develops the mental and physical discipline to have a mono-maniacal focus on one thing for many hours. (It’s all about practice).
  13.  Get fit like Madonna. Getting to your absolute best physical condition will create explosive energy, renew your focus and multiply your creativity.
  14.  Workout 2X a day. This is just one of the little-known productivity tactics that I’ll walk you through in my new online training program YOUR PRODUCTIVITY UNLEASHED (details at the end of this post) but here’s the key: exercise is one of the greatest productivity tools in the world. So do 20 minutes first thing in the morning and then another workout around 6 or 7 pm to set you up for wow in the evening.
  15.  Drink more water. When you’re dehydrated, you’ll have far less energy. And get less done.
  16.  Work in 90 minute blocks with 10 minute intervals to recover and refuel (another game-changing move I personally use to do my best work).
  17. Write a Stop Doing List. Every productive person obsessively sets To Do Lists. But those who play at world-class also record what they commit to stop doing. Steve Jobs said that what made Apple Apple was not so much what they chose to build but all the projects they chose to ignore.
  18.  Use your commute time. If you’re commuting 30 minutes each way every day – get this: at the end of a year, you’ve spent 6 weeks of 8 hour days in your car. I encourage you to use that time to listen to fantastic books on audio + excellent podcasts and valuable learning programs. Remember, the fastest way to double your income is to triple your rate of learning.
  19.  Be a contrarian. Why buy your groceries at the time the store is busiest? Why go to movies on the most popular nights? Why hit the gym when the gym’s completely full? Do things at off-peak hours and you’ll save so many of them.
  20.  Get things right the first time. Most people are wildly distracted these days. And so they make mistakes. To unleash your productivity, become one of the special performers who have the mindset of doing what it takes to get it flawless first. This saves you days of having to fix problems.
  21.  Get lost. Don’t be so available to everyone. I often spend hours at a time in the cafeteria of a university close to our headquarters. I turn off my devices and think, create, plan and write. Zero interruptions. Pure focus. Massive results.

Stay productive.

Source:http://www.robinsharma.com/blog/09/become-the-most-productive-person-you-know/